White

“You’re newness.”
“You are a light so bright
And oh my god, your potential…”
“You’re one and you’re many,
And the way you hold the rainbow together?”
“Effortlessly light as a feather”
“I pick you cause you fit so well,
My God, you’re essential!”
“You’re the end of every fight,
You’re peace and calmness.”
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I’m White.
I no longer have a voice.
I have been constantly talked over.
With me there’s always a choice,
I’m a contrast,
I’m a freakin’ easy option.
Easy to get, easy to do away with. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You find someone too loud for your taste?
Add a bit of me for balance
And I’ll fade out the extra
To calm your nerves
To soothe your eyes.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You met someone too dull?
Keep me on the side
And I’ll make sure they shine
Amidst my dreary lack. ⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You got too bored
Of the same old thing?
Pick up that brush and paint me
In all the shades of your fantasies. ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
And when you’re done,
do me a favor,
The next time you see me,
Just freakin’ LET. ME. BE.

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Grey

I’m grey.
I have a humble beginning.
You’d think I’d go away,
with all my tiny, crumbling pieces,
that you mistake for a light black,
a dark white,
but, you see, I won’t.
I’m here to stay.

You’d find me in the roads you tread
and the buildings you make.
I am in the gravel,
cementing a solid ground
for the wearing walks you must take.
I breathe between the bricks
of your well crafted walls,
beneath the pastels and patterns,
that hide your innocent tricks.

Every now and then,
I appear in the sky,
bringing the world back
to the truth it must accept.
And, you know what?
So should you.

You see, I’m the cloud in your head,
when the whirlwinds won’t stop
picking every ounce of grief and remorse
and won’t stop planting them deep
into your bones and remember
as I rain down from your eyes,
I do not always promise a sunshine after.

I’m this heaviness sitting on your chest,
when you don’t have reasons enough
to keep on with this grey thing
called life-
your strongest bet,
your weakest whim.
Yet,
I am all that will be left of you,
if you don’t die
before you are burnt to ashes.

Black.

I am black, aren’t you?

I am here.
I arrived after the burning,
losing parts of me
I didn’t know existed.
I lost them one by one,
changing and developing
into new, mix shades until
I lost it all, didn’t you?

I’m here, now.
Something tells me I survived
even if the parts of me couldn’t.
And being here, now
I see what I was-
Yellow, red, blue, green,
And now, just black.
I died a little, didn’t you?

I am not there.
But, I remember them.
Maybe one day, I will create
something from this nothingness,
this void, that eats me up;
this lack of void, that finds no release.
Or, may be not. Maybe I won’t.
I accepted myself a little, didn’t you?

I’m not there, yet.
And, maybe I won’t ever be.
So, I’ll just…be here and
make myself a home
to all the darkness,
which speaks of pain, dread and loss,
but, also makes everything else a little brighter.
I’ll go on, won’t you?

Skin

skin

I’m skin. I’m very clever.
I’d change colors and you
wouldn’t even know.

Sometimes, I’ll define you
and your aspirations.
You won’t get it but
I’ll seep in, from the surface
to your mind.
Too dark, too light, too rough,
I’ll never be enough.
And thus, I’ll define you.
Don’t let me.

I’d start off really mellow, soft, fresh
into the bright new world.
Unafraid and ready.

I’ll get bruises and bumps,
I’ll turn blue-black
and all the other shades of
life, misfortune, defeat and dismay.
Without you realizing when,
or knowing what to say,
I’ll become a part of the ravages
of the sun and the struggles and
trying and failing and falling.

I’m a witness
of your moments of weakness
as much as of your strength.

I saw what you did
when no one was looking.
I watched you trying to change me
into who I’m not. I watch you hide me,
but I’ll remember it, and I’ll remind you
of what all I was, what all I can be,
of what you are and what all you can be.
and even as you loathe the sight of me,
even though you’re more,

I am a part of you.
I’ll define you.
This time, let me.

It’s not over.

It won’t be over just like that.
It’s not like turning off a faucet.
Pick up the strands tenderly,
There’s some yellow in there,
Touch her. Roll her over your fingers
for she knew what you did when
you thought she wasn’t looking.
Let her slowly slip away.

Let go of the strands that
they keep handing over to you.
It’s not your fault.
Do not think twice.
Rip them off.
That’s not your burden to carry.
Drown that guilt away.

It will be difficult,
Watching what’s left
of the damage.
“Blue sky, think blue sky.”
Bullshit.
Let not the darkness blind you.

And trust me;
actually, no. Trust the air around you
Trust the yellow that slipped away.
Trust that gut.
Believe in your backbone,
it’s a rarity to have one.
And know, that once it’s over,
You’ll be free.
And please, remember,
It won’t be over like that, still.
It’s not like turning off a faucet.

The balance

It can be more than just black and white, right?
It is so much more
Than the balance,
Than the set patterns,
Than the cycle that keeps moving,
Slowing down where it needn’t,
Pacing on where it shouldn’t.

Life’s much more
Than the monochrome
or the colors,
Than the joy
And the smiling eyes
Watering where they needn’t,
Burning where they shouldn’t.
It is so much more
than a full stop;
And so I put my trust
In the black and the white
In the fire inside.
And I move with the cycle,
Slowing down where I need to
Pacing on where I must.
I take the monochrome
and I take the colors
I hold on to everything that’s inside
And I let go of the balance for a while.

I can be more than just black and white
Or
I can just…be.

Silver.

The first time I recognized silver

was in a star, on my report card.

It wasn’t gold, for exceptionally good;

it wasn’t bronze, needing a lot of push;

it was an acceptable silver,

for those who got by.

 

It took some sweat to see

its tinge between the black and the white.

It crept up, eventually. And always

kept the poise: stripping yellow off its bright,

Adding glitters to the darkest blue.

 

The universe made more sense, now

that the extremes were all sucked dry.

It kept me looking for further more;

I got through, I got by.

 

The cloud stood bare, the lining exposed.

I could move up and ahead,

I was all set…

 

Until

 

I drew with silver

and out came red.