Delhi Deals!


Delhi assembly elections have never been more interesting.

And the Delhi people, oh they are such political enthusiasts. Whether you want it or not they will always want you to bang your heads with theirs till the time you hail their favourite party or you remain conscious (Otherwise, Delhi hai to dil walo ki hi. Lovely people ❤ ).

I definitely don’t blame them. They have persistent problems with limited options and in their heart they too are afraid that there is no immediate resolve. We have media to hype needless controversies and the political parties to create fresh ones every day. One fine leader (Shakespeare uncle said – What’s in a name, so I am not taking the name 0:) ) even demanded Mr. Kejriwal’s nomination to be cancelled because he had stated in it that he lived in B.K.Dutt Colony. Coming from an incompetent leader from an already defeated party it seems to me like a gully cricket match where children are seen appealing ‘Bhaiya ap mat khelo na, ap sixer marke ball gum kar doge’. Jokes apart, and seriously, this news is no news. It is the job of EC to verify all nomination details and take action based on the findings noted. The bloody job of these party jokers is to present forth their manifestos, plans, policies and roadmap for Delhi. All I see around is negative politics and mudslinging. Not to forget the intellectually enlightening debates on NEWS channels (:P) which turn into ‘who’s louder’ contests and have the potential to grow up to a blood feud any day. Even the very erudite and experienced journalists entertain these dumb arguments and relentlessly telecast these in chat shows. We can’t expect better from the common man. Whether media shows us what we want or we see what they show is a different debate and we can take it sometime later. My noble attempt, right now, is to give an argument (I’ll try to keep it logical!) and raise a few points which are not new but are rarely highlighted.

Before I go ahead I want to clarify that I am neither pro-AAP nor anti-BJP. I am a proud delhiite who has the privilege to choose their next Chief Minister amongst an IPS officer and an IRS officer. Whether due to threat or by choice, we finally have well qualified options before us that no other state has had. The competition is clear, the rules are clear, now we need to brainstorm if the agendas are clearly put too. There is some negative and misleading politics happening which we should not overlook. Check out yourself:

1) Campaigning on the name of Mr. Modi

During the Lok Sabha polls, we all knew who our favourite was. We gave a clear mandate as well. BJP might not have been our choice but Mr. Modi was the ideal Prime Minister candidate which worked perfectly well for BJP. Post that BJP also won elections using the same name and face in states like Maharashtra, Haryana and did fairly well in J&K as well.

Dear BJP top guns, we have chosen our Prime Minister and we request you to let him do his work. Modi is now India’s representative to the world and not merely a BJP face for state elections. Please respect his position and understand his bigger responsibilities. In the mean time you could tell us more about your candidates from Delhi and your plans for us.

Dear Mr. Modi, we would never want you to stoop to a level of malicious politics that your party is upto these days. Their being insecure of Kejriwal is natural, yours is irrelevant. We hope for your help and support to Delhi irrespective of which party wins here.

2) Blame games?? Oh please stop this menace!

Another phenomenon we see in these elections is the ‘Blame-game’ politics. All parties take a dig at their opposition. Balanced politics means you also present your agendas loud and clear. Coming from BJP, I see nothing innovative in this sphere. This party is riding on success of Mr. Modi and whenever needed it starts misleading Delhiites with the same old defamatory saga composed for their opponents, especially Mr. Kejriwal. Arvind Kejriwal’s being anarchist or quitting his CM position does not in any way tell BJP’s plans for us. Nor does their questioning the funding source of other parties prove their transparency. We expect to know their policies for Delhi, not their obsession with Mr. Kejriwal or Mr. Modi. Delhi has seen enough of allegations, we want substance.

Why is BJP so scared of AAP that the central ministers had to jump in? And to my surprise, they haven’t been deployed to defend BJP or prepare plans and election agenda but to attack AAP and Mr. Kejriwal. Ms. Kiran Bedi chooses not to debate because she says she believes in working. Dear Madam, we would definitely expect you to work once you are in power. This is the time to win the city and beat your opponents with your vision and strength. Your shying away from a discussion or confrontation only gives us more reasons to consider you weak and unprepared. This is the plight of BJP’s most reliable candidate. The most corrupt ones are however making it a point to throw five questions at Kejriwal daily. The questions, like ever, are meaningless and rotten. They are publishing new derogatory posters every day. All BJP has done in this campaigning can be medically termed as Euthanasia. It is not like throwing themselves from a cliff for suicide. This is rather asking your saviors to kill you because you have an ailment you can’t survive. We do not expect our Prime Minister to discuss ‘Kaali raat ke kaale kaarnaame’ with all those special effects and voice modulations. Obviously, it doesn’t suit a man of Mr. Modi’s stature to dramatize his speech in a way that defames others.

On the other hand, if we talk about petty things raised against BJP then there was the great goof up where students from North-east were called ‘Immigrants’. God save this nation! Calling them immigrants or not, as long as they feel safe and included here, they wouldn’t mind it. To my surprise and relief, unlike Congress and BJP, AAP did not try to use this or any other pathetic issue against any other party. They do make allegations, but they do have proofs. Luckily, those allegations are relevant and strike a chord with the ‘aam aadmi’. And the best part, they never mind excusing mistakes like this and the J&K referendum. Also, they never ask BJP or Mr. Modi about their governance of eight months. Needless to mention that we have all seen BJP spokespersons shouting like mad buffoons at rallies about Kejriwal’s 49 days and… they talk cons. (How sweet of them!)

3) Let’s talk Turkey!

Not only Delhi, but the whole nation has a history of forgetting and forgiving. We have been giving multiple chances to both BJP and Congress since decades. We will surely not hesitate in giving another chance to AAP as well. All we expect is good intent and revolutionary ideas. We want parties to understand concrete issues and come up with some immediate and long-term plans. Politicizing everything is not good nor does it appeal to us any longer. AAP emerges as a ray of hope for the educated class, the poor and the educated-poor. Issues like electricity and water bill have found top spots in BJP and Congress manifestos, thanks to the focus shift brought by AAP.

4) All you Modi fans, grow up!

Mr. Modi is a great guy. Trust me, I too voted for him some eight months back. His history in Gujarat, his work and his energy is worth appreciation. I do not say that he has achieved something great but I am sure that he has a vision and he is at least trying to do something. Besides, I am really pissed off by the illogical Modi fanatics who have some very unrealistic hopes pinned on Mr. Prime Minister. If you are one of them (okay, you may choose not to admit), please go through the points below and THINK!!

  • Mr. Modi has greater responsibilities on him. If you think that he will be working for Delhi then you, my dear, are a sweet innocent idiot.
  • I would have loved it if you had the guts to say that you support BJP or Kiran Bedi. You say you support Modi. Need I say more? However much you support him, you can’t make him the CM of Delhi. (No, I can’t give you any false hopes!)

5) Finally, the proactive BJP followers have guts to admit – ‘BJP being at Centre shall control and might as well prohibit any other party in power in Delhi. So, we don’t take a chance and invite monopoly instead.’ (Hmm… that’s intelligence, people! :P)

If central government being more powerful decides the fate of states then either Gujarat’s development model is a sham or the then central government (Congress, LOL :P) deserves equal and more credit for it than Mr.Modi. If you are saying that BJP will not approve of AAP’s plans even if they are in Delhi’s good then it defeats the very premise that they themselves are going to bring the changes we want. If BJP only plans to hinder the work and continue with their negativity then definitely Kejriwal is going to have troubles. Otherwise, if the central government does its job and state government does its own then we can hope all will go well.

Come on dude, BJP would not have been this desperate if they knew that Kejriwal will not be able to take actions after he gets the chair. If this muffler man comes to power with flying colours, they know their ‘black’ and ‘white’ lives shall be exposed sooner than they can imagine.

Anyhow, the least we should understand is that BJP should not be given complete power right now. Our constitution facilitates decentralization of power and there is a vision of diverse politics and governance guiding this provision. AAP in Delhi and BJP at the Centre is a fairly balanced combination. Let’s not get carried away by our sentiments for a person or party. Lets choose sensibly.

I started at a neutral note. In these elections the only thing I supported initially was that there should be a clear majority. If not AAP, then let it be BJP here. But as the campaigning progressed, AAP won my trust again. And more than that, I lost trust in other parties yet again.

My best wishes to all the parties!

Many thanks to Mr. Kejriwal for his efforts and courage. Thank god, he knows how to deal with them all.

And my dear Delhiites, the re-election is an opportunity to think again and choose better. This time, DOUBLETHINK!

Stress Abuse!


Attention everyone!

Here is a light exercise for your workaholic hands. Raise your right hand if you think that you’re a little ‘stressed out’ these days. Raise your left hand if you think you develop the ‘stressed-out-these-days’ mania quite often. Now with your stretched arms/arm place one tight slap on the respective cheek. And that is, in pure physical form, what we engineers identify as STRESS.

Please don’t panic as I am not intending to give a lecture on stress handling (Google baba will find you plenty on that). I am trying to dig into a rather esoteric matter. Stress, according to me, is more misused than misunderstood. And my complaint here is not with the ones who are genuinely in pain but with the ones who are in a mental state of advertising their problems and causing pain in others’ neck. You’ve got to take me seriously when I say an idiot A’s breakup tales and B’s office miseries on a weekend cocktail party are lethal. Not because they sound drastic but because they are easily relatable. And I can bet half my pocket money on the claim that these perverts only intend to ruin your evening. Tell them to shut-up right away. Or, better let your grilling hand enlighten them on what STRESS does to one’s cheeks! 😉

The latest trend is to pester others with your issues. Worry, I tell you, is contagious. I have this friend who has a hobby of finding all kinds of psycho-social disorders in him. (Yes!) His enthusiasm is worth a glance when he calls out the perfect medical terms corresponding to his versatile mental states and expects me to sympathize. (Duh!) At times, with despondency and helplessness, he would ask me to help him find what his real problem was. And before I give the stressed soul my piece he would blurt out “schizophrenia!”. His quirk amuses me, but more than that I am amused with the sincerity on his face. “Schizophrenia personality disorder!”- he would utter with two grim nods. While I’d be engaged in gathering the meaning, he would sing his break-up ballad expecting me to appreciate his sangfroid in the tempest he is going through. Had I been an easy target, he would have catapulted me to another stress zone. If he wants to say he is a perfectionist, he would say “I have OCD”. (God help him!) His perfect knowledge of his disorders intimidates me at times. But now that I am used to his idiosyncrasies, I have learnt why the noble Thomas Gray was right when he said ‘Ignorance is bliss’.

This was one peculiar case. And I am sure this beautiful world is full of idiots who wouldn’t miss a chance to categorize themselves as MANIACS. Point to take home is that what makes youths mad is their inclination towards madness. Forgive the goons, but aren’t we responsible for our susceptibility? We dig our own graves and lie down in them to succumb to stress which, unfortunately, is just a state of mind. If you don’t believe me, consider what Descartes said: ‘I think, therefore I am’.  Exactly my point- you think you are in a problem, therefore you ARE in a problem.

Now think over. Why is it that every single person, each added responsibility, every passing day is able to make us more insecure? Why are we so fallible to problems that we know we can solve, or, for that matter, we can never solve? Maybe our vulnerability is making us more vulnerable. Maybe thinking over an issue converts into over thinking earlier than we can realize. Maybe it is a specter of our imagination and nothing else!

So for all the soi-disant stressed out folks here is a thought provocation. The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work. If you own those brains that can make a trifling issue a behemoth, then you can certainly find a legitimate solution to it. Invest time in calming your senses instead of googling the theories that take you to sickness. The simplest acceptance theory is that everybody experiences their share of hell. Clicking and tweeting away your problems on gadgets or selling tragedies for sympathies only establishes you as a moron. So before you think Virat Kohli is a stud and your life is a dud, think of him as an eighteen year old boy who lost his father on the eve of his match and yet managed to score 90 the next day and saved his team a follow-on in a crucial Ranji match. His aggression on field might make people say he is a reckless boy who just got lucky, but few would know how his love and dedication for cricket grew into passion overnight.

One needs to channelize one’s pains and trauma (not on Twitter or Facebook, poor fella! ). Nurture your hobbies. Yes, I might sound preachy now but sit in silence for ten minutes every day. It helps. They say finding your true state of mind is like finding god.

Okay! We know what all they keep saying. Earnest advice of millions may be found on internet. Now that you have read some from me you owe me a nice comment. 😉

P.S –

  1. I am neither a counselor nor an admonisher. Yet I feel I can prevent many pissants from socializing their woes and help make the world a better place. 🙂
  2. Spread the new STRESS definition at your own risk. Chances are that you might end up getting two on your face. It is easier said than done!
  3. Special thanks to my anonymous friend who inspired me to write something after ages. Why I quitted writing?- “Heck! I was under the B.Tech stress!” 😛